Note to self: do not read back through old BLOG entries!!! I feel like such a failure, all this talk of losing weight and giving up smoking...I haven't done either of the above so let's just move on shall we?

Let's see where were we...ah yes, Joe and the broken leg....indeed it was broken, he did fall from a low branch of a tree and fell on a funny angle...he was flown back home to have the operation on the Gold Coast and had to wait 10 days before the swelling had gone down enough so they could perform the surgery...he will be in plaster until at least September...Haley is so thrilled...NOT! having someone else to look after...because you know what men are like, they really play on these things.

Jodie and Duane have shelved their plans to buy a house (um that's why they were staying here rent free to save lol) and instead will be leaving at the end of November for a 6 month working holiday in Canada. It is arranged through an Australian agency, they we be working at a Ski Resort somewhere...they are not doing for the money since they will only earn between 6 and 12 dollars an hour...it's rather more for the adventure aspect....Jodie doesn't want to do office admin (which is what she does here) and has applied for housekeeping or waitressing...love to be a fly on a wall, she is as clumsy as I am and has a benign tremor in her right hand (like me also) so carrying cups of coffee will be hilarious! Duane has applied to be a bellhop....lol...wonder how long it will before the glamour wears off and they get sick of being broke and not have mummy to cook for them and do their washing! I think its a great idea and told them they should get travel out of their system before they have kids...to which they replied in unison "we won't be having kids!" I believe them too!

Ebony has been in fine form for weeks now, and her little psycho outbursts have become even more dramatic...gotta love thirteen year old girls with attitude! Her latest drama was she didn't want to do HPE as a subject (sport) this term and carried on so much and made my life so hellish I wrote a letter to the school blabbing on about how much trouble she had been having with an on going virus and how I didn't think sport was such a good idea at this time...so they changed her subject to video gaming...an all boys class where they play and review computer games.....if I thought my life was hell when she had to do sport....well it got a whole lot worse when she was put into this class lol....she sux at computer games and all the boys were giving her curry so I had to send another letter saying how much her health had improved and maybe sport would be good for her...those teachers must think I am a dead set loony...the things you do to bring about a bit of peace. The fact that I am "gay", old fashioned, don't trust her, a loser and the meanest mother in the world didn't even come into play when she ws begging me to write that second letter!.....and I know what you are all thinking....I shouldn't give in to her bratty behaviour...you are so right....however you don't have to live with her rofl!

Should probably mention the photo of the cakes??No reason, just had a cooking day...I actually like cooking but I hate the fact it takes all day and all gets eaten in one afternoon... my lot are not shy when it comes to food!

We have new neighbours over the back fence and they have chooks...no worries.. I am terrified by chooks but we are separated by a fence so I could deal with it...until the other morning when I walked into the lounge room and there standing right before me with its beady little eyes looking straight at me...was a bloody chook...I nearly passed out, but realised I had to do something so I tried to shoo it out the door.....chooks can poo while they run...very effectively in fact so I ended up with chook poo and feathers all over the place till the stupid thing finally went out the door...then I had to ring Duane to come and catch it and put it back over the fence and plug up the hole where it had found its way into our yard...great! Now I live in fear everytime I go outside to hang out the washing.

As I have been typing this I have beem listening to Ebony asking her father if she can have a guinea pig tomorrow. The fact we don't have a cage didn't seem to register as she says she will put it in a washing basket... I could hear him weakening so I interjected and told her she can't have a guinea pig tomorrow we have no cage, end of story. She told me she will never learn responsibilty if she can't even have a pet......I struck below the belt and reminded her that at the start of the year her cat had been missing 10 weeks before she even realised it was gone..........I am back to being "gay" blah blah!

Is this just happening to me??? I already know all the people who have perfect children but is there anyone else out there who puts up with this kind of crap...please I am begging you come forward and cleanse your soul and make me feel better..lie if you have to!

Those little grandies of mine are sure growing up fast aren't they! Emily still comes for a sleepover at least once a week. Last time she was here I spotted her doing something naughty (I saw it in the reflection of the oven)...when I scolded her she was shocked how I knew so I told her I had eyes in the back of my head. This fascinated her so she tested me a few times to see if I knew what she was doing (and I did because I could see it in the reflection)...she stood there gobsmacked and then tried it out herself and sadly told me the eyes in the back of her head must be blind. I told her only Mum's and Nannys have eyes in the back of their heads lol. Gotta love gullible kids!

Six weeks ago I paid for a three month membership to the gym and I went for the first time yesterday..better late than never...for the first week I am supposed to do 5 minutes on the rowing machine, 10 minutes on the exercise bike, 5 minutes on the cross tainer and 10 minutes on the tread mill, then repeat.....My first day I did the rowing machime, exercise bike, the cross trainer hurt too much so I quit after one minute, did five minutes on the treadmill and decided to skip dpoing it all again...but today I felt guilty so I decided to go back and try harder....when I got the the Police Youth Club (where the gym is) the car park was chockers with police cars and there was a channel nine news crew at the door...I wasn't sure what to do , didn't know if I should enter then thought buggar it I will just walk in now....just as some important police union official was walking out and the camera crews were all scuffling for photos and here am I with my daggy trackies on water bottle in hand dodging microphones and flashes and cameras...lol, they must have edited me out because I wasn't on the news tonight. Damn, I missed my big chance to be famous!

I had to clean the salt cell on the pool the other day, it had been ages since I had done it and it was completely clogged with salt....made it nice and clean then screwed on the cap but unfortunately when I turned everything back on it was leaking like a sieve. I went to take the lid back off to check it out and the lid would not budge. I put on some rubber gloves so I could get a better grip but I still couldn't get the damn thing off. Asked Duane if he could get it off but nope, no luck...thinking it was buggared anyway I thought I would tap it with a hammer to see if I could loosen it...but still no luck. I called the pool shop and they said they would send someone over to look at replacing the whole salt cell thingy...The guy came and unscrewed it first go...so remember folks clockwise to do something up and anticlockwise to undo...it cost me thirty bucks to find that out!!!

Talk to you all again soon